988: The New Lifeline Number & More Ways We Can Work To Prevent Suicide
TW This article discusses sensitive topics including suicide & depression
So, good news! As of July 16, 2022 there is now a 3-digit crisis line for people contemplating suicide. When an individual calls 9-8-8 they will be connected to the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. This line can be accessed via text, chat, and phone call and links callers to trained counselors in their region.
This could be a really wonderful thing as it is quicker to use during crisis and will become ingrained in people’s minds, just as 911 is. The previous hotline number is long and may require a person to have access to the internet to look it up. For someone who is depressed, every extra step can feel incredibly difficult. So, transitioning to a number that’s short and easy to remember could result in more people using it. Calling the old number will still route a person to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline services.
What is the lifeline?
The Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is accessible 24/7 for individuals seeking free support while in emotional distress. Whether it’s suicidal thoughts, substance use crisis, or mental health crisis, this is intended to be a lifeline. All information shared remains confidential.
What happens when a person calls or texts 988:
- Caller is greeted by an automated voice message while their call is routed to a trained counselor close to them. This is based on area code.
- The counselor listens to the caller and connects them to resources.
These are the basic steps, but I highly suggest you take a look at the website for Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. The site goes into more depth and provides additional resources, attempt survival stories, etc.
Now, I have seen a lotttt of reposts of this number and I think that’s great! What I’m scared I’ll also see is people using this as a way to reroute loved ones. If someone close to you comes to you and confides that they are struggling heavily, I hope and pray that you do not brush them off and route them to talk to a stranger over the phone.
This is a topic I hold near and dear to my heart. As someone who has been open about major depression and suicidal ideation & planning in the past, I have some thoughts on this topic. Again, I see some performative posting. Reposting this number is great, but not enough. There are other ways we can actively work to prevent suicide.
More ways we can work to prevent suicide
This crisis line is a step in the right direction, but there’s more we can do to prevent suicide. Here are a few ideas:
Check in on your people.
Especially the ones who are always doing the checking-in.
Reach out without expecting anything in return.
When I was in a really deep spot, I didn’t even have the energy to spit words out of my mouth. Every word felt heavy on my tongue and blurry in my brain. This being said, I didn’t always have the energy to respond to texts with more than a thumbs up…or at all. But all those little check-ins helped to save my life. Know that even if they don’t have the energy to give you the utmost appreciation now, those text messages, those voicemails, those calls… they make a big difference.
Mean what you say.
If you say “I’m here for you.” Be there for them. Specify the ways you can show up for them. Let them know what you have the capacity for. You don’t have to be their everything but even just an “I love you because _____” or “I really care that you’re here” can make a big difference.
Specify the ways in which you can show up for them.
It’s tough, you know. The suicidal person often doesn’t want to place a burden on anyone else and the loved ones often fear they may have to take on more than they can handle, which is fair. Here’s the good news: you can still be a good friend without taking on their heaviness. Their depression is not yours to carry, and (hopefully) no one is asking that of you. You can be there for someone AND state your limits. But, if you just say “I’m here for you” as a general statement and then later tell your friend whatever they are asking from you is too much, it can make them shy away from coming to you for any type of support by the fear of not wanting to place any burden on you. A good way to avoid a strain on either end is to specify the way you can be there for them and be honest when you feel that you don’t have the capacity for certain types of support. If it’s a phone call, distraction, running errands, cooking a meal, taking care of their pet, stopping by, that’s great. If it’s listening to them, allowing them to vent, and really hearing the depths of their heart, that is great too, but you may not have the capacity for certain things and that’s okay. You don’t have to show up in all the ways, just specify the ways that you can.
Call when you say you’re going to call.
I had people close to me tell me they were going to call me every day. They were going to Facetime me, they were going to check in… I didn’t receive a single call from those people. Which, truthfully, hurt my heart more. If you say you’re going to call, you call.
(I also had people close to me who did call and check in and I want to acknowledge that and honor them. You know who you are.)
Sit with your sad friend.
Many times, I didn’t need my loved one to try to fix my problem, take it on, or even listen to me. I just needed someone to grab my hand, tell me they love me, and sit with me. When I was struggling with suicidal ideation, my friends and family distracted me, helped me slow my breathing, and found little ways to invite me out of the house or just out of my own mind. They were understanding, patient, and compassionate.
I know it’s a tough thing to navigate and no one really knows if what they’re doing is the “right” thing. I’m not here to tell you that you’ve done something wrong, but rather to give some advice from the perspective of someone who might know a thing or two about what your loved one in crisis might need. Unfortunately, doing these things can’t guarantee that someone won’t go through with it. And I’m sorry, unfortunately, I can’t guarantee that either. But these things helped me.
I owe a lot of my recovery to the people I was surrounded by. And sadly, a lot of people don’t have this kind of support system. I’m really fortunate to have these people, a therapist, and access to medical services. Not everyone does. That is why this line exists.
My best friends and family sat with me when I wanted to die, and that’s why I’m still alive.
The Suicide & Crisis Lifeline has sat with many people when they wanted to die, and that’s why they’re still alive.
I hope you never have to use 9-8-8, but I also want you know that it’s there.
& remember, asking for help is not a weakness. It’s a strength.
Additional Resources
National Alliance on Mental Illness
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